Why I wash my hands

This is a weird topic for a 32-year-old entrepreneur to write about. I should finish that one task that will magically increase my sales, or finish that chapter my half-opened book is reminding me of. But what’s life if we do what we’re supposed to?

Now, you would think not washing hands and picking your nose are simple, straightforward, human things to do. But you would be wrong. In my case, anyway.

I used to have extreme pride in doing random unhygienic things. 

Like not taking a bath for a week, as if I want to enter Guinness records. Or washing hands as often as I saw a falling star.

When my friends and family tried to teach the dumb chimpanzee that I am, I had a toolkit of nonsensical responses handy.

Why use the soap? When washing hands with water is as good as a sanitizer.
Why learn basic etiquette? Isn’t it the job of everyone to eat their own food and not stare at me.
Why keep the hands away from the eyes and nose? Isn’t that how Sherlock accessed his mind palace.

If only I was half as determined, I would have closed twice the sales when I started up.

After thirty years of my holistic regimen, one fine day, I got pneumonia with a bacterial infection. I was admitted to hospital, but I thankfully recovered over a couple of months.

While I was sleeping in the hospital bed in a very pretty hospital gown, I felt for the first time - 

Wow. This would be a really silly way to die.

That’s it. That was the switch. Not washing hands, picking my nose and few other habits I hoarded as if they are Kohinoor, are just street marbles filled with mud, goo and 100 other tasteful things. And more importantly, they are stupid, dumb ways to die. 

So I wash my hands now.

Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

Now I will get back to the tasks that I should actually do.